MKE #3 – Week 23 – Tapering off

As the end of a certain experience is imminent

I feel peptides activating in the absence of absolute certainty.

Is this the end?

Is that it, no more chances to do what I desire?

Is time up?


Lessons in detachment can be tricky.

Although I feel i would be content to simply

lay meditate in a detached state for eternity

I also feel pulled into little dreams

that emerge in my mind

something I would like to experience.

I have an overall idea of what I want and a whole lifetime

is comparable to one day within that life.

What do I want my whole life to reflect.

Is it over yet?

Can the day also end at anytime if my life is that unpredictable?

Scheduling could be a choice.

Or not.

I could be living on any time table

yet I want to be in a certain timeline

associated with the world.

I am curious about others ways of being I have not tried yet.

Sometimes it seems like

I am jumping through hoops to maintain

composure or balance of my daily life.

I always make it to the next day

so far.

Its not that I don’t want to live

if I didn’t at all i’m sure i wouldn’t be here

right now typing this.

Its the peptides that continue the pattern where I

last left off.

Once momentum is going,

I don’t like to stop what is familiar

or change a habit

until I’ve initiated an innovation

than I adapt and am okay with it.

Routine sets in and I forget all else.

This is what my is for now…

 I surrender to what I feel I must do

in this moment.


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