MKE #3 – Week 8 – Growing My Conciousness

I have been practicing observing what I am observing

for awhile now.

Last week I noticed that perhaps that my life reflects only that which

notice, pay attention to, accept, welcome and allow to matter in my world.

My world within and seeming world without.

Things really are not ONLY what they seem at a single moment in time,

and from one specific point of view.

Not saying all points of view are any less valid than another.

If everything is made out of the same material, it seems to me (from my present perspective)

that every single thing there is; must be 100% equal!

Beauty, or what is valuble and/or meaningful can be narrowed or expanded as far as infinity

and beyond if given the space in our little patch of fertile mind soil.

The willingness to allow myself to recieve has been a two-fold relieving feeling

and also terrifying for subby.

I think ‘Why oh why has it taken me this long to let go?’

Simple and not always easy answer, FEAR.

Each time I am pulled into full crystal-clear realization

so sure of what is true, about myself and my world.

And then I completely find myself lost not an hour later,

following the train-track of my previously practiced paradimgn.

I think I just get bored with feeling all right.

So i go from one extreme to the other,

all wrong, all right, all wrong, all right…

Like a seesaw!

It can be entertaining I suppose.

But also quite tiring in itself.

To find my center in the morning and lose it gradually just past midday,

only to find relief in my pillow where my soul bounces back to

it true nature.

Like a compass needle, we may wobble before finding our true north sometimes.

We cannot defy our true nature or deny our true needs for long before

there is a breakdown, a surrender of our personal will (ego)

to the infinite universal will.

So why do I fight it, so religiously, yet seemingly

oblivious to that which I am doing?



Click Here to Leave a Comment Below 6 comments
Nancy O - November 18, 2017

“I think I just get bored with feeling all right.” Might this be where old peptides rear their ugly heads to say FEED ME- FEED ME and the seesaw starts?

    Kendra - November 20, 2017

    My favorite guide!!! Yes, thank you for pointing that out Nancy, I admit I am still working on filtering thoughts with more discipline. I love being held to high standards!

Sheryl Boyle - November 17, 2017

Practicing being the observer and learning how to detach from our attachments is a great skill to learn. Obviously you’ve been doing that quite well. Keep observing and noticing your process. Keep asking for the meanings behind your observations as they are guides for you in expanding your consciousness and claiming your universal birthright of being the mistress of your own life. Blessings on your journey Kendra!

    Kendra - November 20, 2017

    Hi Sheryl!
    I love being the observer, the key for me is remembering to detach as early in the day as possible and keep that idea steady like a candle flame in the main focus of my mind.
    Once I remember that ‘God is My Source’ I receive so much inspiration and joy from that thought alone that I find it is all I ever wanted and need anyway.
    I love the bible verse “Seek first the kingdom of heaven and all the rest will be added to you.” That is quite literally true for me!
    All the guidance and successful actions steps flow from here, the Source.

Lee Frisch - November 14, 2017

Very interesting! Thought provoking! Thank you! 🙂

    Kendra - November 20, 2017

    Hi Lee! Thank you for reading!


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